Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Thank You Note Etiquette from Wedding Paper Divas

As I've discussed on Twitter before, thank you cards are a sticking point with me. As anyone who has attended a wedding, given a gift, and then received no thank you card in the mail can tell you, thank you cards are important. They let the giver know that you received the gift and you appreciate it. A personal, handwritten note goes a long way in our digital age, and some people will remember a well-written thank you note forever (I still get comments from some people four years later!). They'll also always remember not getting a thank you note, or getting a very delayed (six months, a year later) thank you note. So write them early, write them often, and have fun with it. Here's some tips on thank you notes from the invitation and stationery experts at Wedding Paper Divas

Response time:
The number one question is “When should they be sent?” Brides and grooms should wait no more than 6-8 weeks after the ceremony to send their wedding thank you cards, but of course the sooner the better! As some planners and I discussed on Twitter recently, the 6 months to a year "rule" that gets bandied about is just plain wrong. 6-8 weeks is the new three months. :)
If you receive gifts before the wedding, send the thank you cards out as soon as you get receive the gift. Order a different set of pre-wedding thank you notes if you plan on sending out a thank yous with pictures from your wedding later on. If you have over 100 guests attending your wedding you can imagine how much time this will take so get ahead! It also helps to make a goal and send out so many thank you cards a day.
Another tip for speeding this process up is to order your thank you cards when you order your wedding invitationsThey don’t need to match, but if you purchase them with your wedding suite it will present a more cohesive look and you won’t need to go back later to order them.

The contents:
Sometimes this can be a daunting task for couples but make sure to greet the guest, express your gratitude, be specific about the gift, and thank them for attending (or for thinking of you if they couldn’t make it).
It is also nice to make specific examples of their gift and tell them how you use it. For example, “I love making my coffee every morning in the machine you got us!”
Make sure you spell their names correctly and are including the right gift for the right person.
For monetary gifts, it is not necessary to mention the specific amount but simply say “thank you for your generosity.”
Make sure to also send thank you gifts to people who attended but did not bring a gift and also always remember to send thank you cards to your vendors for helping with your beautiful event.

Addressing and Sending:
For families, address the envelope to Mr. And Mrs. If you are close with them, you can use their first names inside the card or if you are not that close use the same salutation inside. 
Make sure to hand stamp every note as prepaid postage techniques are too impersonal.
Once you follow these basic etiquette tips sending out thank you cards should be a breeze.

Make sure to browse the amazing selection of thank you cards from Wedding Paper Divas!


  1. Oh I am so glad you posted this - I'm about to order my thank you notes and it looks like they have some really good ones! Thks for the tips.

  2. I recently got married. Relieved that my thank you notes are finished, but you have me thinking. I didn't thank the guests for coming who didn't send gifts. I feel like that is kind of awkward and almost passive aggressively addressing the fact that they didn't send something. My parents and in-laws hosted an incredible weekend filled with delicious food, drinks, dancing, and lots of celebrating... all free for the guest who showed up empty handed. Am I being horrible for not thanking them?

    And some of those guests are the same ones who didn't RSVP. I know I shouldn't hold a grudge, but I can hardly help it.

    1. I totally see your point. I think it comes down to a personal decision. I know I definitely didn't mean it as a passive agressive gesture, but as a genuine thank you that they took the time and expense to come to our wedding. In the US, most of us have two weeks a year off. That's not much at all. The fact that people had to spend several days coming to and attending my wedding was not lost on me, nor was the cost associated. I was thanking them for being there to celebrate with us, no hidden agenda. The RSVP thing really bugs me, too. Completely understandable in that case! I would have done the same. :)

  3. Wedding paper divas are just fabulous... great way of thanking the loved ones... Wedding Ideas and Collections

  4. Thank you cards are the same important as wedding invitations. I want to pin your pictures for my tumblr.

  5. Thank you very much for the information, it is very useful to me, and i hope you could continue provide this kind of information to benefit us.

  6. Love thank you card and invitations designs


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